Not so proud moments of mommyhood

I had a great day at work and once I got home my anxiety kicked into high gear. JT was super fussy, demanding, pushing, falling on the floor, pushing toys off the table. I did my best to address his behavior and then ignore it. It worked for a few moments and then it would start again. I kept myself in check until we cuddled in the chair with his last drink of the night. To my horror the bottle was leaking all over JT, the blanket, the chair and myself. I took the top off and screwed it back on. I tipped it over and no leak. Once it was back in JT's mouth it started leaking again. I lost it momentarily and got up quick to go change bottles. JT threw a fit and I lost control and stamped my foot into the floor. I yelled to Kevin so he wouldn't think it was JT's head, "That was my foot!" and then stood there while my foot throbbed. Lesson learned. Some days things just don't sit right with me. The music coming from JT's room, listening to Kevin talk and argue with his gaming buddies. The little things that didn't bother me the day before suddenly become the nails on the chalkboard. Even though these moments are few and far between, these are the honest nights that I question my parenting skills. It's a scary revelation to know that your every action and mood is so easily picked up by your child. In the same vein these nights are a great source of self-discovery and reflection. I'm going to go work it out by working out. It'll all be better in the morning.